Saturday, January 01, 2022

It's been about a year ago when I wrote:

"Thank you all for just being here with me for the past 11 years. I'm not done yet."

It's 12 years now and I've been thinking about this for a while now and I've decided that I'll take a bit of a break from blogging. I can't tell you how long I'll be gone and if I'll come back to this blog.

I'm still here. And I'm still on other platform, I'll just take a break from writing. I was never good at the whole networking thing so I never managed to build much of a community (which is entirely my own fault). Nowadays I just scream into the void and at this point in my life it's more frustrating than it is fun so I'm taking a step back.

Big Thanks go out to the about 10 people that still read this blog and I hope we'll meet on others platforms or maybe already have. Thank you and a Happy New Year!

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Friday, December 31, 2021

2021


2021 is over honestly it felt a lot like 2020, but not exactly. It was still all a bit uncertain, but less chaotic, less turbulent, with no big changes. Time went by at a reasonable pace.


I struggle at identifying what my main feelings or topic were for this year. It was a weird mix and I felt strangely 'out of sync' with my own life and the world around me at times. Trying to 'get back into sync' kept me busy. 

Some things that happened this year:

  • I kept working on my home aka. goblin den. It's filled with some more shinies and trinkets, and I love it. 
  • I got my very first handmade dice by SkullkittenFaeryArts and I loved them so much that I immediately got a second set and I don't plan on stopping there!
  • I badly hurt my foot in March and I still have trouble with it. That kept me from being as active as I wanted to, especially taking long walks through the forest. I miss it and I hope by next spring it will be well enough.
  • My snails got three more accidental hatchlings in the spring (Pancake, Poptart, and Cheesecake), sadly only two of them made it (Poptart passed away). And another one in October (Cinnamon Bun) that is growing strong.
  • I played D&D and I even managed to DM another adventure for my family. I really want to do that more often. They love it, I love it and I think being a DM once in a while helps a lot with the game in general.
  • I did a little bit of knitting, consistently working on some bigger projects and finishing smaller ones. 
  • I learned how to crotched! That was very exciting because I always wanted to learn and finally did it!
  • I changed my hair color around just a bit - got rid of the red, back to dark green, added some blue and purple, black, different shades of green - but I always come back to my dark green in the end.
  • I still work at the same job and it's still not all sunshine and rainbows, but I still love it and my team developed in a nice direction.
  • I continued publishing YouTube videos. My channel has still not grown (not that I'm actively doing anything to promote it ...) I just like editing videos so I'm fine with how it is.
  • In 2021 I published 43 blog posts.

My resolution last year was to work on next year is being able to stand up more for myself in conversations ... to be able to talk uninterruptedly, not being talked over, not getting obvious stuff mansplained to me and being able to say "Stop, saying sh*t like this is not okay." 
And I did work on that. I have gotten better at it, still not perfect and where I want to be, at definitely better. 
Next year I want to be less focused on the negativity that people bring with them into situations. I already know that this is going to be hard. I grew up having to always be prepared for people's mood switching which made me very vigilant of even small signs of negativity. Combined with the fact that the same people loved to focus on all the bad and horrible things happening and only talk about the next big catastrophe all the time. I already unlearned a lot of things from back then, but this hypervigilance and focus on others' negativity is something that I want to tackle next.

With that I want to say Goodbye for this year - I wish you all a wonderful New Years' Eve! Be kind and be careful!